With

Maybe a part of you is still lodged in my lungs
Because I can taste you when I breathe out

That I were inhaling you now
My eyes have been open for 5 hours too long

The ghost of your fingers on my hips my legs my hands my hair my face

Your face looks most beautiful one inch from mine
Eyes half crossed and lips sloped in giddy euphoria

Awake

The absence of feeling made no difference

Until you touched me and I felt it

Like a burning poker in my brain

On my lips my stomach my neck my legs my chest

You burned yourself into my body

Awakened me now I can't sleep

Cold in the white sea cold sheets pillows skin

Kept warm with the steam of your breath

Hazy air in the filtered light of sunrise

Chapped lips swollen red with blood

Exposed and intimate

Warm hands cold feet

Sex

And this is how it starts

Fall asleep on your chest, in your arms

And your shirt looks so good

When it's crumpled on the floor

You said use your hands in my spare time

We've got two things in common 

One's this tongue of mine

You said

You haven't let her go anyway

Twenty minutes before you drop me off

All we talk about is comics and sex

You haven't let her go anyway

You haven't let her go anyway

I love our friend when I saw your film

He's got a funny face

But I like that, cos he thinks he's cool

You haven't let her go anyway

You haven't let her go anyway

And now were on the bed in your room

And I'm about to fill her shoes

But we stay slow

Please don't go

Did she take care of you

Or could I easily fill her shoes?

But you say no

Please don't go

Now we're just outside of town

I'm making my way down

You haven't let her go anyway

You haven't let her go anyway

And I'm not trying to stop this, love

If we're gonna do anything we might as well just fuck

You haven't let her go anyway 

You haven't let her go anyway

You got your long looks anyway

You got your hushed words anyway

You in your own world anyway

You and your best friends anyway

I'd suffer for you anyday

They've got their side looks anyway

They've got their issues anyway

Don't You Mind

I led you straight down a dead end path
Don't you mind
I haven't prayed in 4 months
Don't you mind, don't you mind
I walked away when I should have turned back
Don't you mind
I didn't tell you when my heart was black
Don't you mind, don't you mind

Your throat was raw
My eyes were dry
I'm running in the opposite direction than where my heart actually lies
My phone is on
I won't reply
Oh, you know I didn't mean to drag you down, but there you are
Don't you mind

I should have let you go
Don't you mind
I was too young to know
Don't you mind, don't you mind
I was jealous of the lines you cut
Don't you mind
I love you
Don't you mind, don't you mind

I should have let you go
Don't you mind
I was too young to know
Don't you mind, don't you mind
I was jealous of the lines you cut
Don't you mind
I love you
Don't you mind, don't you mind


This is my version of the song 'Me' by the 1975. It's an incredibly personal song to the lead singer, listing his darkest confessions. I felt, it being so personal, that to truly understand it I needed to put my own confessions in place of his. So this is actually very soul-bearing for me. 

Your Eyes

Tonight I looked into your eyes until mine went blurry

But I still couldn't tell you their colour

They are everything

The ring of blue like the ocean encroaching on the amber shore 

But also green like the forest I got lost in 

Caramel like the sweetest of coffees

Grey as the storm raging underneath your surface

What I wouldn't give to spend more time pondering you

Battle

The darkness and the Light
Rage inside of me
Battling for my soul

The Light compels me
It does not deceive me and it loves me
The path it reveals leads only to good things

The dark craves me, it is seductive, it calls me to bed
It leads me blindly down a path which ends in a sheer drop
Into the abyss

I can only stand back and watch as the war rages on
This is not my battle
I am not fighting here, I am no soldier

This is a war over me
I am the prize, the spoils, the battle cry
Soon I will have a champion

Consume Me

You evil gorgeous disgusting exquisite repugnant seductive appalling ravishing thing

I'd nearly forgotten

I'd been free of you for

2 years

3 months

18 days

7 drinks

346 drunken words

12 hours

Many desperately conflicted thoughts

And you're back

Now I'm questioning why I sent you away

You are vile

Shameful

Disgraceful

My biggest secret

And my closest friend

I remember you

In the darkness you whisper to me, comfort me, consume me

I am yours and I become you
I adore you and I loathe you

I turn inward until there's nothing but us, the dark and the moment

I must shut you out again

I must not turn back to you

I must be free of you